Casual dress has unfortunately encroached on more formal events
Dear Joy, I recently attended a wedding and was surprised to see how casually dressed so many male guests were. Sure, it was a hot day but I don’t think it has ever been appropriate for men to wear shorts to a wedding ceremony and sit-down dinner.
The female guests looked great, but the males were far too casual. Just a handful wore a tie and jacket, while many wore golf shirts and shorts or khakis for this formal wedding.
After my husband saw these casually dressed male guests, he started ribbing me about “making him wear a jacket and tie.” Of course, I told him to be quiet or I would pull his tie a little tighter … Laurie
Dear Laurie,
Blame it on the “business casual” dress code at the office. Fewer and fewer men have a jacket and tie in their closet, and refuse to tighten a tie for any event other than a job interview or a funeral.
Casual dress is evident everywhere, and has even encroached on our most formal events. I also enjoy being comfortable, but do believe that a respectful guest should wear an appropriate outfit in honor of the occasion.
Joy’s Bridal Tip:
What should a respectful guest wear to a wedding? Clothing choices are usually determined by the formality of the event. Let’s look at some standard clothing guidelines for wedding guests.
Very Formal Evening-Black or White Tie Event (200 guests or more; after 6 PM; hotel or country club reception)
Women should wear long or short evening dresses. Men should wear black tie (tuxedos) or white tie (tails). “Black tie” or “White tie” is indicated on the invitation.
Very Formal Daytime Event (200 guests or more; noon or afternoon; hotel or country club reception)
Female guests should wear short dresses or suits. Male guests should wear a suit.
Formal Evening (100 guests or more; after 6PM; hotel or country club reception)
Women should wear elegant long or short evening dresses, or suits. Men should wear black tie tuxedos.
Formal Daytime (100 guests or more; before 6PM)
Female guests should wear an elegant daytime dress or a luncheon suit. Male guests should wear a suit.
Semi-Formal Daytime or Evening (100 guests or less; ceremony conducted at a home or chapel)
Women should wear a stylish evening dress or dinner suit. Men should wear a suit.
Informal (Daytime event; beach, picnic, second wedding, etc.)
Women should wear a stylish dress, sundress, or suit. Men should wear slacks with a sport jacket and tie for an indoor event. Golf shirts and khakis are appropriate for men at an outside event. Low heeled shoes should be worn by females at an outdoor picnic or beach event.
Another dress rule: Female guests should continue to stay away from wearing a white dress or outfit.
White is reserved for the bride, and the guest who wears white appears to be competing with the bride. Black, though, is an appropriate guest color option for an evening wedding.
K. Joy Schaeffer is a bridal consultant. You can e-mail her your bridal questions, comments, wedding ideas, or personal wedding experiences to bridejoy@yahoo.com.