Speaker pushes women to raise self-esteem
Women are responsible for their own self-worth. In a laughter-filled presentation that capped Women’s Day at Penn State Fayette, The Eberly Campus, keynote speaker Barbara Braunstein told the women present that there are easy ways to raise their self-esteem.
Her frank, common sense advice on Thursday came in a package that included crowd participation, self-empowerment and reminders to stop feeding oneself and others negative messages.
Braunstein’s presentation was called “Here I Am World: The Good, The Bad and the Wrinkles.”
“When our self-esteem is high, everything in our life is better,” Braunstein, an internationally acclaimed speaker, said.
She said two out of three women have low self-esteem. While that’s a high number, Braunstein said that changing how you feel about yourself is up to one person.
“Only one person can raise or lower your self-esteem: you,” she said.
When women find they’re blaming others for how they feel about themselves, Braunstein said they’re giving away their personal power.
Having higher self-esteem does take some work, Braunstein said.
“It’s not as if there’s a high self-esteem fairy who’s going to tap us on the head when we sleep and it’ll be there in the morning,” she said.
Among the points that Braunstein made were that women should celebrate their successes and learn to toot their own horns.
To remember how to do the latter, she asked audience members to think of a young child. At 3 or 4, children don’t hesitate to bring up their accomplishments and clap for themselves when they’ve done something good.
“They’re full of themselves,” said Braunstein, laughing. “It’s our birthright to be full of confidence and self-worth.”
That confidence goes away thanks in part to the messages that adults give to kids that stifle the natural tendency to rejoice in accomplishments.
When women find they’re downgrading themselves or what they’ve done, Braunstein told the audience they need to yell “Stop,” then replace the negativity with a positive message.
Can’t yell “stop” when the message is going through your head? Braunstein suggested what she calls the “snap out of it” trick: keep a rubber band on your wrist and snap it any time negativity rears its ugly head.
She also talked about letting go of the past, and any guilt associated with it, by leaving things that happened in the past there.
“The past is the past. Let go, and move on,” Braunstein said.
Culling wisdom from poet and author Maya Angelou, Braunstein reminded the audience that there is too much good in the present to feel bad about the past.
“I did then what I knew then. When I knew better, I did better,” Braunstein quoted from one of Angelou’s many books.
And guilt, she said, comes about when behaviors and beliefs don’t match up. The solution to avoiding guilt is to alter one or the other so that they are on an even keel, she said.
She also urged the women there to accept their physical bodies as they are instead of evaluating what other women have better.
“Some of us are truck sized. Some of us are limo sized. Some of us are Volkswagens,” she said.
But no matter the make or model, everyone has issues about how they look.
Braunstein also reminded the audience to compliment people freely, sincerely and specifically and to remember the only two words necessary when they are complimented: “thank you.”
Kind words “have a ripple effect and spread out into the world,” she said.
And in receiving criticism, Braunstein suggested viewing it as information that could potentially help you improve.
The day, which ran from 7:30 a.m. to 3 p.m., also featured sessions on the blessings of sisterhood, relaxation techniques and fashion.