Nov 9, 2004 4 min read

She emptied my wallet again. It was Friday night and I had just gotten home from work when the telephone rang.

“Hello,’ I said.

To which the voice on the other end of the line asked where my lovely wife was.

“She’s not here Kendra. She’s in Maryland.’

“What’s she doing in Maryland,’ Kendra demanded.

I explained she was there for a second time in two weeks to help care for her great-nephews. The family had been struck by accident and illness and assistance was needed. It wasn’t anything too serious and I didn’t mind if my wife spent a few days there. She made a vat of beef stew before she left, although I am very capable of feeding myself. It was appreciated, however, even on the third day I made it my main dinner course.

“Well,’ Kendra continued after the explanation, “I don’t have any money, and I’m going to the movie so if you really loved me you’d give me $10.’

It seems she was at a girlfriend’s house and discovered she was out of cash. Naturally she instantly thinks of me when she finds herself penniless. Why? Because in her case I’m the softest touch on this planet or the next.

I have been trying not to be. Most times my wife is here and she runs interference. I tried to be firm. My first inclination was to tell her to go to a matinee because they are cheaper.

Deep down, I knew that wouldn’t work. Then I remembered I had gone to the store on the way home and was down to just a few dollars. I hadn’t gone to the bank that day. It wasn’t a priority. After all, I had planned on spending a quiet night at home reading after having had my beef stew for the day.

“Kendra, I don’t think I have $10,’ I replied.

“Well, you could just give me your credit card,’ the 12-year-old replied.

Somehow the phrase “never in a million years’ came so quickly to my mind that I immediately began thinking of where I might have some money stashed in the house. So much for resistance.

“Let me look and see what I have.’

I managed to come up with $8. I had four $1 bills in my wallet and four $1 coins (the latest in a series of the government’s attempts to rid society of $1 paper bills) in my change box.

“All I have is $8,’ I told her. “Is that enough?’ I said, almost pleadingly, like I was talking to a loan shark who was about to break my legs unless I turned over my last cent.

“Yeh, that’ll do,’ she said. “I’ll be by to pick it up.’

I thought about driving to the local ATM and withdrawing some more cash. I nixed that idea. For some reason she knows when I have money and I might have had to give her more.

Anyway, she arrived a little later, long enough to dash into the house and grab the money. I made sure to tell her that the coins were dollar denomination since they might be mistaken for something less.

“Well, they won’t take these,’ she declared.

“What? Sure they will,’ I said. “They’re money just like the bills.’

“No, they won’t take these,’ she said.

“Well, it’s all I have,’ I said.

That seemed to end the discussion.

Then I asked what movie she was going to see. “I think it’s ‘Raise Your Voice,” she said.

“Didn’t you just see that last week?’ I asked.

“Whatever,’ she replied heading for the front door.

“You’re not going there to meet boys are you?’ I accused.

“Yeh, I’m going there to meet a whole lot of boys,’ she replied with 12-year-old sarcasm dripping from her voice.

For a moment after she left a complete feeling of helplessness enveloped me.

I was happy that she belongs to someone else.

She should be happy, too. If she were my kid she wouldn’t get to speak to a boy until she was 30.

Who am I kidding?

Have a good day.