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Ask Carley: Alternate ‘plus one’ wedding guests not an option

By Carley Roneyscripps Howard News Service 2 min read

Q: My cousin was smart about the response cards, listing the name of each person invited, with a space to accept or decline.

But a few guests have crossed out the names of significant others and added new names. Now it’ll be weird that some are bringing completely random guests. Will my cousin sound rude or cheap if she calls these people and tells them they can’t bring someone else?

A: No. That’s exactly what she should do.

Your point about offending guests who weren’t asked to bring a “plus one” is spot-on. Taking the time to include each invited guest’s name on the invites should have been the clue that crossing out the name and inserting another one was not an option.

As long as she’s polite about it, calling guests to let them know that alternate plus ones aren’t an option should be mostly drama-free.

(Carley Roney, co-founder and editor in chief of The Knot, advises millions of brides on modern wedding etiquette at www.theknot.com. Visit www.theknot.com/askcarley for 800-plus answers on all things wedding.)

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