Faith, friends are there when needed most
Never be afraid of who you are.
As a graduating senior, those are my parting words: “Never be afraid of who you are.” Because over all the years and experiences, I believe that is the most important lesson I learned at Waynesburg University.
As a prospective student, the academic rigor is what drew me to Waynesburg, not its deeply rooted Christian mission. In fact, I dreaded the faith-oriented aspects of this campus. As a Catholic school graduate, the mere thought of more bible classes, high-strung believers and preachers of sin did not seem too appealing. What I did not realize was that eventually I would depend on it.
Surrounded by Catholicism’s piercing guilt in my household, I felt like Waynesburg University would contain much of the same. However, I discovered many other denominations and beliefs that I trusted more.
Like most college students, I was struggling with my understanding of faith and trying to come to terms with being a homosexual in a prominently Christian institution. Filled with an already bleak outlook on homosexuality and sin, I visited other churches for an answer.
Unfortunately, my answer came loudly and clearly from a pastor addressing his congregation. “You can’t be a homosexual and a Christian.”
Over and over he kept shouting it, his heightened fiery voice scaring me. So I ran, I stood up and ran out the door and onto the street in the pouring rain.
And here I was trying so hard to be a Christian-to live like Jesus. I remember thinking how silly I was to think I belonged in a church or belonged at all. I cried that day. Depression sunk in and, like an iceberg, a mere cold fraction of me emerged.
It was like I finally understood that there was no reality where I could coexist with Christianity and there was something severely wrong with being who I am.
I stayed in that icy cocoon for months, a shell of myself. My close friends chipping away at it attempting to break it open.
The day they succeeded came before a race when a teammate handed me an old, regular rubberband with the words “Be Strong Phil 4:13” handwritten in ink.
“I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.”
A new message resonated in my head, a positive one. I finally began to understand the true meaning of what it is to be Christian. I did not find faith through my upbringing, or in a church, or even with a pastor. I found it through my friends and peers, and in being surrounded by the strong Christian mission of Waynesburg University.
I owe so much to this institution, and an appreciative thank you to my teammates, coaches, professors, friends and fellow communication students for helping shape me into who I am today. The faith instilled so profoundly on this campus, I believe, has a way of seeping into our lives and changing them for the better.
I now live my life never being afraid of who I am.