Of all the board games in the world, I had no idea that Yahtzee has plenty of violent stories surrounding it--even to the point where the stories that include kidnapping aren't even true. This week's column will look closer into the Yahtzee phenomenon.

A story filed in the You’ve Gotten Old Dept. happened after my wife and I purchased a Nintendo Switch video game system for our 10-year-old for Christmas.

Let’s face it, Valentine’s Day isn’t for everyone.

This week's column deals with artificial flavors and scents and how they open a whole new world of fakeness.

Of all the emails that trickle through the cracks to and drip on my computer, the one that didn’t get flushed happened to be about a survey by Enviro-Master, a health and safety company, about what they call the risky business of using public restrooms.

It’s true what they say, every rose has its thorn, every head has its tail, every yin has its yang and every Cheech has its Chong.

The procrastination involved with taking down Christmas lights is a phenomenon that scientists are eventually going to get around to studying when there’s a warm day and when they have a free afternoon.

Even though dogs sitting below dinner tables are a far cry from their hunting ancestors of the wolf, the cunningness of the hunt is still in all domesticated dogs and this week's column shows how they hunt at you dinner table.

Thanks be to the retail gods that the holiday shopping season is finally over! Most of us survived, although broke and broken and broken and broke and, of course, broke.

I don’t know about anyone else, but normally around June or July, my thoughts go to whatever will be considered the words or phases that are most used throughout the year. Such insight comes when you don't have much of a life.

If you've ever wondered what eggnog would taste like if you would pour spirits in it other than the normal rum or bourbon, but you were afraid that such thoughts spoken out loud would land you in an asylum, then no worries because that's what this week's column is all about!

It has been settled that "Die Hard" is a Christmas movie, but what about "Die Hard 2"? This week's column explores why it is by comparing it to another Christmas classic, "A Christmas Story".

As a service to parents fighting tooth and nail to get toys for under the tree, I present my fourth-annual Parental Misery Index (PMI) guide.

There's something to be said about nostalgia--some people want to cherish it and others want to constantly reinvent it. This week's column shows those differences--mainly between my wife and I during the holiday season.

Anyone who reads this column on a regular basis knows that I love writing about holidays...and aliens...and toilets...and robots...and my tendency to lose focus on whatever I’m writing about...and...where was I going with this?

I don’t care how smart you are, the task of ordering your child’s class photos can push any IQ to the breaking point, and this week's column will show you why.

If you haven't noticed, potato chips, cookies and even alcoholic drinks have embraced releasing new and different flavors like cheesesteak potato chips, chocolate mint sundae cookies and bacon-flavored vodka. In this week's column, I'll tell you why and what to expect next.

If you've ever played the game "Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon", then you've maybe already played my new game, "Six Degrees of Coronavirus". The rules will be in this week's column.

In my constant observation of childhood rituals through the eyes of a jaded adult, I have to say that people have really missed the point of trick-or-treat. And in this week's column, we'll explore the phenomenon.

I know when an important election is coming up when I see PSA commercials that I need to rock the vote, that I need to vote or die and now I can't vote naked...I think. Maybe I have to pay more attention.

While I was doing the “Locally Yours” radio show a few weeks back on WMBS, my co-host, Bill Madden, suggested there should be a cookbook for bachelors...okay.

Welcome to the first, and most likely last installment of According to Hofmann’s World of English (AHTWOE). This week’s subject is Acronyms.

I remember as a child being in my grandfather's basement, perplexed when seeing all the mason jars full of canned food, but found out he did so because of the Great Depression. Now, as we get through our depression of a pandemic, I can't wait to see what cultural practices carry over to my future grandchildren.

As if I’m not jealous enough of children now-a-days, even in the dumpster-fire year of 2020 has caused me to have great envy at my 10-year-old stepdaughter, Emma, when she went “back to school”.

An aspect of a summer vacation with your family is the chance that your children may end up with a vacation friend, which is another kid that gloms onto your kid for better or for worse or, in my case, a little of both.

One of the many downsides to any vacation is packing the family car for a torturous road trip. But no worries, I'm here to give you the finer points and tips on packing for a trip...even though it's the end of summer.

Has there ever been an established protocol of thanking someone for holding a door open when going through two sets of doors? In this week's column, the answer is yes. You'll just regret asking the question.

Maybe it’s the pandemic, but lately, I’ve really taken notice how people sneeze...so much, in fact, I wrote a column about it.

I didn’t want to write yet another column about my ongoing belief that computers are out to take us over like I learned from movies like “The Terminator”, “The Matrix” and “Throw Momma From the Train”, but please keep in mind that the machines forcing my hand (well, both hands since I type) and made me write about just that.

In this week's column, I look at my psychological urge to overeat. So grease your thighs, wedge into the passenger seat and let's take a ride to Absurdityville.